True Love
When it comes to the creative connection between a man and a woman, we live in a world where that connection often begins with the realm of sexuality, and manipulation. The word “love” gets misused to explain a hormonal high that lasts for a while… and then eventually fades.
The creative play between men and women is absolutely necessary. It forms the basis of society and the foundation of our future generations. But it depends on our consciousness if we create hell on the earth for each other, or heaven. Hell comes when we look to another person to fulfill our expectations, and become angry and bitter when they do not. Heaven comes from living for one another, in a spirit of giving and service.
When I meditate on Guru Gobind Singh and Mata Sahib Devan Kaur as the father and mother of the Khalsa nation, I get the sense that these two Beings of Light understood something very subtle and beautiful about the relationship between men and women. Their creative connection that exists far beyond the realm of physical intercourse. There was a merger of energies between them, an honoring of the Spirit, that allowed them to give birth to a family, not of blood, but of consciousness.
From Mata Sahib Devan Kaur’s side, she, as the woman, acted with devotion and selfless service towards her Guru-Husband. She surrendered her biological need to have children, and trusted him to guide her actions and her life in accordance with his wisdom (she lived as his virgin bride since she was promised to him after he had already married. See a video about this). She lived in her purity, with grace. And she allowed her relationship to the Divine to be the foundation of her relationship with her husband. In this way, she was the quintessential spiritual wife.
From Guru Gobind Singh’s side, as the man, he saw the Divine within Mata Sahib Deva Kaur’s heart. And he protected that heart. He did not rape it or exploit it; play games with it or break it. He perceived her vast spiritual capacity, and when the moment came, he bestowed upon her a Throne of Consciousness that called upon the Divine potential within her. He had the wisdom to see the longing for children in her heart and he fulfilled her. In this way, he was the quintessential spiritual husband.
That is the true potential of love between a man and a woman. The joining of the subtle energies to open a dimension of Light that can bring the heavens to the earth. A dimension that gives hope, removes fear, and elevates the mind to recognize Infinity.
It was this kind of love – compassionate, not passionate; timeless, not temporary; reverent, not manipulative – that gave birth to a spiritual family. A family that has lasted for over three hundred years, and that today exists in every country, across so many languages, cultures and peoples.
During Vaisakhi, we rightly remember the Five Beloved Ones who had the courage to give their heads, without question, when the Guru called for them. We perform the Amrit ceremony, where the Banis are read, and steel and sweets infuse the water, to keep the Khalsa strong, wise, and kind. We recall the profound humility of Guru Gobind Rai who requested that the Five Beloved Ones initiate him into the Khalsa. We sing, “Waho Waho Gobind Singh Aape Gur Chela.” Great Great is Guru Gobind Singh, who is both the Teacher and the Student.
At the same time, it is also important to remember the selfless devotion of a woman, who sacrificed her earthly desire to be a mother, and who has the destiny to step into the role of the Divine Mother. To be the Mother of the Khalsa is to set the example. To be the Mother of the Khalsa is to have a heart that can tend to all the cries of the children. To be the Mother of the Khalsa is to maintain the standard. To be the Mother of the Khalsa is to encourage the family to never give up.
But most important, to be the Mother of the Khalsa is also to be a Divine wife of Guru Gobind Singh, engaged in the most subtle, spiritual play of love. Where the creative polarity between masculine and feminine opens a doorway in the heavens, bringing light, peace and healing to the human race.
Wahiguru ji ka Khalsa
Wahiguru ji ki Fateh!
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Related Articles:
Resources on Mata Sahib Kaur, her life and spirit: The Sweetest of Birthdays
A sacred discussion about the mystic nature of Guru ji: What is the Tenth Guru to You?