Many people ask, 'Why has it been that every society has placed great emphasis on preservation of female virginity until marriage?' Most people believe that its old fashioned nonsense instituted by patriarchal societies.
Actually its evolutionary biology at work, where every creature's primary biological responsibility is to successfully pass on its genes to the next generation. Simply put 'survival of the fittest'.
Humans are much too complex and hypocritical so scientists often take a look at other mammals to get a basic understanding of the human animal.
Take the case of a pride of lions. It consists of a number of female lions and their cubs but only one dominant adult male. He alone will mate with all the females of the pride and produce their offspring and fiercely protects the entire pride.
This is nature's way to ensure only the strongest and most capable lion will pass on his genes to the next generation and all inferior ones will be driven away.
Other males constantly challenge the lion to take over the pride. When a stronger usually a younger, healthier challenger succeeds in the fight for dominance the old lion is driven out by the victor.
The first thing the new male does is, he kills all the cubs in the pride. This brings the lionesses into heat and ready for mating quicker than normal, so that they will mate with and produce new cubs which will carry the genes of the new male.
Like all mammals, human parents also fulfil their biological duty to procreate and ensure survival of their offspring. However one thing is obvious, males because they play a small role in pregnancy, childbirth and nurturing of the young are more casual about mating and raising families than females. Hence males biologically have a smaller stake in the pair bond.
Unlike most animals, its different in humans. Its very challenging for a human child to survive and succeed without the support of both parents for at least 12 years. Barring exceptions, generally, the mother provides the nurturing and the father the resources and protection.
All successful human societies have historically evolved to ensure that couples stay together to ensure the health and prosperity of future generations. This is why separation, divorce and abandonment of the female was frowned upon and strictly restricted.
A mother is sure, but the father can only trust its his child. If the male suspects the child is not his, the risk of abandoning the child and even the mother becomes very high. The only way a male could be reasonably sure that the child is his, is to mate with a virgin. Until now once a woman entered a household, the possibility of sexual infidelity with other males is almost completely eliminated. Even if they were frustrated and unhappy this approach to virginity and fidelity kept couples and families together.
Modernity has produced many benefits, but the price to human wellbeing it appears has been disastrously high. Now with modernity, birth control is easy and dependence of females upon the government even easier. Women are in effect marrying the government, which tends to replace the man and his role in the family. Hence virginity, fidelity and concern for the male plummets with increasing modernity.
Biology however never disappears. The devastating effect is males continue to mate and produce offspring but more of them either abandon the family or are driven away by women leaving the mother and child to the care of overenthusiastic, overreaching governments trying to play 'God'.
In their zeal to increase their numbers many religions encourage more births. They lean on their governments to embrace and even encourage single motherhood. The net result is that while quantity of the population grows the quality suffers as families and homes get destroyed producing high percentage of emotionally, psychologically and socially disadvantaged children.
Societies and leaders know its easier to prevent broken children than its to repair adults later in life. Sadly the rapid march towards greater modernity makes it almost impossible to set right the situation
A strong family with both parents staying and working together is essential for the protection, healthy upbringing and nurturing of children. This is something no social minded government can replace no matter what laws are passed and how high the financial support may be.
Western societies being very modern have relative to traditional societies much higher percentages of families disintegrating, and broken children as a result of perverse and misplaced ideas of freedom.
The paradox of modernity is there is great material prosperity but also a greater social impoverishment. Insecure personal relationships, leads to high levels of emotional and mental stress. This is reflected in constantly increasing levels of alcohol, drug and substance abuse amongst the population, accompanied by ballooning incidence of compulsive and obsessive behavioural disorders.
The West has made incredible scientific, technological and economic gains, which developing and underdeveloped countries can learn from and emulate. Countries like India still have the opportunity to learn from the West on many of these matters.
However it will be socially, culturally, and religiously fatal if countries seek to modernise simply by blindly copying westernisation as it will be to hark back to adopting thoughts, actions and laws of medieval times and all their negative traits.
Whatever path of modernisation we now adopt, 20 years from now the trend will become almost irreversible. The time to ask important questions and review our social and cultural approaches and options is now.
Parents, and well meaning leaders in the community, society and government must remember that, While freedom is very important, reckless freedom is inevitably fatal.
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Gurvinder Singh
~ July 2019
